A Tarot Story by Ian Bryant
INTRODUCTION
Continuing the practice of using a tarot spread for storytelling, this time around I used the Tarot in the Land of Mystereum put out by Schiffer Publishing to help guide this meditation. I want to thank Schiffer Publishing for providing me a copy of this great remake of Jordan Hoggard’s originally self-released deck. Some of you may remember seeing it on Aeclectic tarot along with a great interview with Jordan by Bonnie Cehovet. Some things have changed since that first version (a few body parts have been covered up, for instance, to make the deck more appealing for all ages) but all the mystery and magic of the original remains. This deck drew me in and before I knew it the text you are about to read was born. I hope you enjoy the trip.
All Tarot in the Land of Mystereum images © 2011 Jordan Haggard. Published by Schiffer Publishing.
I’ve been here before… Night after night I find myself laying on this slab, staring up at the pinpoint hole at the top of a pyramid, four triangles reaching upward to an exit out of reach, sacred geometry conspiring to hold me in. Yet something calls me, to see beyond the walls and acknowledge the visible sky above. A chance, it whispers.
While I know I’m asleep, I reach out to the life I’m living above the covers, a life in a loop, something wrapping me in threads of distraction, tying me into a circular path from which I can’t seem to break free. Here I have the opportunity to make the leap, to sit up from this cold stone and stretch upward toward the top of the pyramid. Make a break from this prison. How long have I been here? I have seen the sun and then the moon pass over me, barely visible through the pinhole top of this pyramid, several times. Was that different nights of dream? The same dream? Does it matter, having no strength to raise myself off the slab, no energy to leap upward to the light.
Whose world is this, it whispers again, if not yours? And I understand, finally easing my thoughts enough to see what I must do. Not a prison, after all, but much needed seclusion. I take a moment, I breathe deeply and slowly ease into a sitting position, cross my legs slowly and close my eyes. This is my dream, my world. Slowly, I hear the sound of grinding stone, I visualize the pinpoint of light moving. Mathematical equations begin to change values, geometries shifting in my mind. Then I open my eyes, look down at the pyramid top now reversed to bottom, below and inviting me in. No more loops, no more missed chances. For the first time, I leap headfirst into the unknown, diving straight down into the light…
…
Somehow I realize how I came to be here, what issue was holding me back, spinning me in circles and keeping me from the straight path. Balance is here, now above the Earth the pyramid fired me out from, every planet and star whirling in a dance of measurement and adjustment, a concert of swaying scales around me. When had I last acknowledged my place within the universe, on Earth and among humanity? Everything was about distraction and enjoying every titillating thing that came my way. I took it all in, an attempt to deaden the sadness of the things I felt I had no control over. A constant battle between judgement of others and judgement of myself.
Here above the world, part of the celestial dance, I have focus. Hovering between the Moon and Earth I feel my place and the forces that pull me in either direction, adjusted to keep in my own orbit and not offset the balance of it all. Why could I not do that in life? Know my place, adjust my trajectories with those around me, rely on my own power instead of reacting constantly to the forces of others, the force of things?
This concentration gives me joy, swells my spirit with power and a sense of freedom. The roar of thoughts, of needs and desires, has subsided and I choose what to focus on now, not them. I choose what direction to move in, what path to take, while maintaining the balance of being. Separate yet included, a star of my own right yet at peace with all the suns of existence. Every human is a star, every star has its trajectory and yet works together to hold the fabric of existence together such that we can continue. My judgemental aspects were focused only on my own desires, and instead of balance I found chaos. With all my concentration I set my eyes upon the furthest star and fling myself toward the void, streaking forward to meet it while honoring the force of the matter that gives me leave…
…
Lo! I rejoice! I was the Past and then, the Present! Now I am the Child, the Future. What starry seas are these? What Infinity? Could I write the sights before me upon some permanent fixture I could not spell them, for they are of pure wonder! Across the Abyss is all I had dreamt, of all I had imagined existed beyond the prison of my human mind and perception. Of course this Is! Of course I Am amongst It! Now beyond the farthest star, hurtling on into the Void, yet with new eyes I see it is not void at all, but full of life and energy, pulsing with color and form.
What’s this? Some entity that reaches out to me, full of Love, full of Will! Urging me onward, ever forward, a crescendo of cheers to see more, “Forth from the dusk!” they cry, “Let the Beyond be born again!” I am the Babe upon which this new light starrily creeps, such sights, such sights…
…
Morning, now in the World, and I sit quietly at my window, a warm Valerian tea in hand and eyes upon the throng below on the still lamp-lit streets. Every point of connection is visible, expanding and contracting between each person like beams of light, between every human and their surroundings like rubber bands.
I have no questions, at least not here. I have no desires, at least not here. I have no material wants. I am at ease, I can smile. I am at peace, I can wander out. Wherever I am now amongst people I am open and ready, willing and amenable. What dream was that, and if not a dream, what reality? Perhaps both, but it matters not. The wisdom I so vainly thought I had is now with me, gained through letting go rather than holding on.
I am a new spirit. I am freed from the abysses of my heart. Ready to give as much as given, enhance what is around me instead of tearing it down, and to ever learn, never full, with humility. Seeing the world now as a land of restful possibilities.
Dawn breaks, and sunlight penetrates…
FINI